Dear Confused,

That’s a great question!

For some people, being around other people’s children ranks right up there with public speaking, driving downtown and going to the dentist — they do anything they can to avoid it.

There’s just something about those high-energy little ones that can turn a completely secure individual into an unusually awkward adult. You don’t know what to say to make them like you, you don’t know how to act, you don’t know what to do… It just feels uncomfortable.

I once knew a guy who could never get comfortable around kids. Oh, he tried! But for all his present buying, Sponge Bob fluency and high-five attempts, the kids simply didn’t warm up to him. If only he knew the secrets of Sittercity’s professional babysitters…

Babysitters are a part of the select few who can always, always win over a child, so if you want kids to be more comfortable around you, just use these 7 simple babysitting tactics to make all that awkwardness go away.

1. Relax

First things first: Don’t psyche yourself out. If you put too much pressure on yourself to be super likable and super playful, you’ll come across as just the opposite. Remember, hanging out with kids is FUN.

2. Get Down to Their Level

Towering over children makes you seem very “adult” and can make you appear intimidating. If you want to make a child more comfortable, kneel down to his level when you introduce yourself.

3. Find Common Ground

If, for example, a child is clutching a stuffed animal, you could say something like, “What a cool-looking bear! I used to have one just like that, named ‘Teddy.’ I took him everywhere with me — to the playground, on car rides and even the beach!”

4. Ask Questions

Kids like talking about themselves, so be observant and pick out things that you can ask about. If you see a baseball mitt in the corner, ask if the child likes baseball, whether he likes batting better than fielding and which hand he throws with.

Ask for demonstrations too. For example, “You throw with your right hand? Okay, let’s see it! Pretend you have a baseball in your hand and show me how you would pitch to me.”

5. Be Expressive & Encouraging

Since children are so expressive themselves, it’s good for you to be expressive too - even if it feels a little silly and exaggerated. For example, if you see a child’s drawing on the fridge, get excited and say, “Oh WOW, that is an awesome drawing! You really did that? You’ll have to teach me.”

You’d also be amazed at how a big, genuine smile can put a shy child at ease. Remember that building up a child’s confidence is always a great way to get them to warm up to you.

6. Avoid the Baby Talk

There’s no need to talk to children in a high-pitched, singsong voice — trust me, it doesn’t make them understand you any more or like you any better.

7. Be Flexible

Let kids take the lead. Even if you decide that you want to take the child outside and toss a baseball around, you have to be prepared for when he or she decides to switch gears and head over to the swing set.

Image credit: momlogic.com

This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 5th, 2010 at 9:30 am and is filed under Ask Genevieve. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.