Oh, date night, where have you gone? I’ve been longing to see you since April 26, 2017. We try to schedule you but just when we think it’s a go, we’re reminded there’s a 1-year-old and 3-year-old that rule, well, our lives.

Sure, the pandemic hasn’t helped, but let’s be real. Even before COVID-19 came in and rocked our world, date nights were few and far between. Illness mysteriously popped up on the day we were supposed to have a date and other obligations cluttered our calendar. Time for dates with my husband seemed to evaporate.

I remember before my first son, Owen, was born my husband and I set an intention to get a babysitter once per month and have a date night. It happened a few times and then we realized maybe a date day would be better. By 7pm we were just plain tired. The thought of putting on makeup and doing my hair—not to mention socialize—was not appealing.

So, date days became our preference. If friends asked us to go out, we always suggested the mid-afternoon meet-up. We could be home by bedtime and then have the night to ourselves curled up on the couch—separate couches, of course. Who am I kidding? We were in bed by 9 pm.

Today doesn’t look much different except our “date nights” are in rather than out of the house. Here’s a peek into how they’ve been going lately.

Chad: “Want to find a movie to watch later?”
Me: “Sure!”
Chad: “Ok, I found one that starts at 9:30 pm.”
Me: “Cool.”
(9:25 pm rolls around)
Chad: “I don’t think I can stay awake to watch a movie.”
Me: “Me neither. Let’s go to bed.”
At least we tried, right?


My mom tells this funny story about how she and my dad—who had two kids and then a set of twins all within five years—would have very occasional date nights. Instead of going to a nice dinner, they drove to a park to makeout. I’m not going to lie. That sounds pretty nice right about now.

I will say we’ve tried to get more creative about how we date these days. It’s not on purpose and just kind of happened. Chad and I both took time off over the holidays and chose to send our kids to their daycare a few days. We cleaned out the garage, put some shelves up in the basement, and even spent an hour attempting to golf in an indoor simulator (I won’t even tell you how that went for me). Sexy, right?

While some might not classify those as date nights (or days) they felt that way to us. Kid free for a few hours and getting to spend uninterrupted time together was glorious. It was just the reset we needed for “us” before 2021. And Chad and I try to “date” in our day-to-day with subtle touches and flirting. They go a long way in keeping us connected until our next big date. When will that be? I don’t know but I’m hoping it’s sooner than 2022!

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